I missed a few days more than usual...

But i'm still gonna have to give anyone out there following me this month a quick recap of the past few days b/c they are so worth it.

Saturday 8/28/2010 Day 18: So "Amazing"

Well not that i really want to be on the show but my sister loves the show and is an avid fan! So i had no choice but to go and be her partner in crime and attend the amazing race tryout/casting. We had to drive to the 99 restaurant in tewksbury mass and stand in line for about 2/3 hours so we could get in front of the camera for 60 SECONDS... and try to make the biggest impression of our lives!!! Not easy haha. So if you got a random text or email from me asking you a personal question about what makes me so amazing lol then that's why not b/c i wanted to have my ego lathered with praise! Its Ramadan I'm trying not to do that.

I'll have you guys know though that in the spirit of Rudyard Kipling's poem "If" I made full use of the 60 seconds and bordered on what i would think was an insanely amazing impression haha. We'll see... I mean honestly i'm one of the best "racers" in the world man how hard could it be ;-)

Sunday 8/29/2010 Day 19: Wow, Fasting is really hard sometimes...

This morning I got up early and stayed up this time. I didn't actually go back to bed, but i stayed up reading b/c there is a hadith (hadith = story of the life/sayings of the holy last messenger; prophet Muhammad, salallah hu alaihi wa sallam = peace and blessings be upon him). It says that when one stays awake in the early part of the morning until sunrise Allah (God) will allow his rizk (rizk = daily sustenance) to come to him easily. This means that instead of working really hard your day becomes considerably easier. I'd that that's not something hard to believe nor is it hard to relate to. When I was young i though of sustenance as food and water and i noticed it was really hard to evaluate how hard i actually had to work to get it b/c mom and dad were there doing it all for me. Now that I am a little more seasoned I realize that sustenance is derived not only in the act of eating or driking but also in participating in the act of attaining the means to eat or drink. Therefore, work and your livelihood is directly related to attaining sustenance. Hence, when you sleep in late and then go to work you can often notice that you are starting behind time, and things can seem like they are a little more difficult to get done but often when you wake up early you are a lot more productive; you get your morning workout done, you have an early start with getting stuff completed and ultimately that is what keeps you in a state of balance mentally so that you can be productive in your day to day responsibilities. Ok i said all that to get to this point I was fasting so i wasn't going to eat any food but i was in a better mood for the morning and b/c i was awake i was able to go to play some morning basketball with my brother and some buddies at Elliott park in Brookline b/c they play really early in the morning on the weekends.

It had been a really long time needless to say and man it was 2 hours of the hardest fought layups that I've ever gotten. I really notice how terrible i am when i haven't played basketball in a long time and it kinda makes me self conscious. I mean i used to play all the time when i was young so i know i am amazing but...NOT NOW HAHA! It was so exhausting though. Basketball just takes it out of me b/c I am constantly banging against people trying to keep my balance with people pulling and leaning on me so when i was done i was sore in all the places I never feel on a regular track work out. I felt like i was back working at gentle giant and it was my first day back all over again. I had to fast the rest of the day too!!! My throat was parched, my legs were cramping and my feet felt like they were on fire the whole time and that is not an exaggeration.

After basketball my brother and i then went and helped my father pick up a washer and dryer...I'ma keep the story short. It took us 6 hours from 10 to 4pm. Honestly between the peak moving season and organizing vans that could do the job it was nearly impossible. Thank goodness we stuck it out and its over and we're all happy.

That day was one of the roughest days of Ramadan for me though. After b-ball man i just felt like every step i took i was going to fall b/c i just had no energy. Those are the times when you know fasting is really hard but if the mind is committed then you can always find a way to do it. We broke fast that day at 7:20 or so and it couldn't have come a moment too soon haha. I think i drank about 40 cups of water that night haha ok maybe more like 13 but you catch my drift.

Monday 8/30/2010 Day 20: Back to school again!!!

Well this day was a pretty exciting day. I got to teach at SCSU as an adjuct professor, and it was the first day of classes so the campus was transformed from ghostown to live and living city of new haven all over again wooooohoooooo!!! Thats great but also difficult. Its great to see all the athletes again but its so distracting when there are so many new people and campus events going on at the same time. I must say though I did well and had a productive day one of school. Lecture was good, kids on the team were fired up to be back, I fasted ;-) and even managed to go out on a 20 min run and some bare for striders! I'm the man...

Holla back!

Ma assalama my people
Mustafa

Day 16

Ran though a pack of dogs today. Had no idea where i was going b/c i was walking through some really thick bushes! then all of a sudden I stumble on an open field and see a pack of dogs. They immediately just start chasing me and run me all the way back through the bushes and up this really short tree which was high enough just to keep me out of their mouths!

J/K: Now wouldn't that have been exciting haha. Not really!
The truth is it was just another day in the month of good ole Ramadan. I had suhoor (i'm getting good at it again yaaay!) and then went to SCSU to see if i could meet the new president of the school! I didn't get to meet him in the organized setting that we had planned to meet him. I cant say i am mad though b/c the plan was to hang out at an ice cream social and if you only knew how torturous that would have been for me just imagine yourself there not allowed to eat any of it! Instead, as me and the other track coaches were walking across campus to check on some friends we bumped into him for a very brief but fulfilling moment!

I have been keeping up with the reading and the days have been boring by design so as to maximize on my subr (subr = patience) and self awareness and restraint. Sorry for boring yall... the fun stuff is coming... I hope lol.

Ma-assalama
Mustafa

Ramadan day 14

Yo people, I've been waking up for suhoor makin it happen and things are starting to smoothen out. However, I'm considering a little venue change man. I gotta get the most out of this spiritual opportunity here in Ramadan man and the generosity of Allah during this time. I will keep you guys posted.

The fasting rhythm is getting better though. The reading is not that bad either but it will be a continuous process of purification and personal clarity until the end of Ramadan and i pick up where the month has left me.

On a different note: I started work today though again for the year. It was totally amazing...NOT! I sat in a 2 hour long compliance meeting and realized all the things i have to learn/re-learn about coaching at Southern Connecticut State University! Its gonna be a trip but all i know is watch out, b/c when i make it happen finally its gonna be over and SCSU Track and Field is gonna light an athletic fire under the rest of the athletic department.

Ma-assalama
Mustafa

Ramadan day 12

man i'd like to say i'm so in the zone that I just cant remember the days but thats hardly the case haha. Today was normal enough. Made suhoor, ate well got up had a good day reading and felt fine during the day. The big day is tomorrow, got a lot of training to do! Its about to be on. Tonight though i'm gonna go to see if i can get some dinner for a quick sec... not totally excited about it but it will be something different i guess. Git at your boy.

Ma-assalama,
Mustafa

Ramadan days 9 - 11

I'm so angry right now so if this blog comes out sounding that way then understand that its b/c i didn't wake up for suhoor this morning! I just dont understand what the problem is with alarms these days! They are supposed to wake you up but if they dont even go off then thats grounds for being taken and dumped in the river, like a disloyal family member or friend in a mafia movie! This phone has one last chance before I take it there!

Its been difficult to blog b/c for the past few days i've been behind on my readings and having to catch up through the night, so i end up forgetting to write. The days have been somewhat routine though. Nothing majorly special except for the occasional burst of random physical exertion with 10 minutes recovery. I'll be practicing soon though so those sessions of activity will be a lot longer and organized.

But we're in the second third of Ramadan now, so the momentum i've already built for the first third is something i have to keep and even build on. Spiritually i've kinda missed a little and i feel kinda like I have room to improve. I just dont feel like my "Rooh" (inner connected spirit, heart and soul) is strong right now, which is the most important thing to everything successful in my life. If i'm not successful or feeling happy about where I am with things I can often correlate that with being displeased or unhappy with where I am spiritually. I am not unhappy right now, but I just know I can be so much better! Well I got 19/20 days to do it up so lets get it and keep it moving!

Peace
M

Ramadan day 8

Well I missed suhoor today. what a let down. I woke up on time but felt like laying there for another few minutes and didn't press the snooze button on my alarm but actually turned it off. Now i know why the specific snooze button is so important! I had good energy today though at camp. I had a good conversation with the arts and crafts teacher though. It felt good to talk with someone my age for once who actually had a life away from the camp itself.

We also went fishing in the river. It was an interesting ordeal. I didn't really love it but it was a pretty leisure jaunt with the kids and it was a nice way to kill some time. I played a little catch/tag on the river bank and that was a kind of hard. One i was fasting and two i hadn't warmed up. My body was talking to me like: "Mustafa, why do you tell us to do things that we dont really want to do right now WITHOUT WARNING US WITH AT LEAST A WARM UP FIRST!? Please discontinue all non survival activity now before we do it for you."

Because of that one little episode of tag i had to take a little nap today and then KO my readings. Did it and i was right in time for iftar. Guess what it was... DONUUUUUUTS!!!!! aaaaaaahhhhh I was so happy and they tasted so good. They were so good that I wanted to eat more but the sad thing about that is after 2, they all just start tasting the same for about 2 weeks! Luckily i had enough self-restraint not to eat more than one so now donuts are an option in the near future iftars!

Fall workouts start next week man (monday) now that camp is over. The most grueling and tedious part of the track and field season. Its gonna be interesting (Translation: hard, tiresome, annoying, I will loath every minute of it haha).

Ma'as-salama
Mustafa

Ramadan Day 7

Back on track man! I ate suhoor today!!! It was a simple meal just two bowls of cereal (honey bunches of oats one of my favs). Got back to bed after fajr (morning prayer) and got a good little rest going. I didn't wanna wake up man and go to camp it was so good but i made it to camp.

Upon arrival i saw my brethren Gulian man! He didn't see me though b/c he was walking up the hill as i just got to camp. I ran up to him and jumped on his back! I trusted that he could hold me up b/c he is a D-lineman and weighs 220 and was boasting about how he squatted 405 two days ago! He held me up...I knew he would! Its amazing what a difference suhoor made for me today. I hiked up about 3/4 miles today up hill and then RAN the same hike later that day...and felt a little tired right after but now i feel like 100+ bucks! It was a serious 30 minutes today haha!

Got home did the reading WITHOUT A NAP! I dont attribute this my day entirely to the fact that i had a good suhoor haha! Anyway, Its time to go to iftar right now so you know i wont delay that!

Be easy readers (if there are any of you out there). Talk to you guys tomorrow.

ma'as-salama
Mustafa

Ramadan Day 6

I missed suhoor today!

I went to bed late like 1230 working on some stuff and planning for Monday and idiotic supervisors at camp and forgot to set my alarm! It’s been on 3:45 for the past few days now but i remember setting it for 5:45 the other day so i could sleep after suhoor and still wake up early. anyway I totally forgot to set my alarm and that would explain why i missed suhoor this morning. I remember thinking to myself though while i was laying down... why hasn't my alarm gone off yet? it seems like i'm getting a good rest tonight... Let me look at my clock just to make sure. Oh shoot!!! I missed it! well, oh well just gotta suck it up and make it happen like I always do. no excuses!

I got up prayed and slept for another 2 hours before i made my way to camp so i could enjoy and pass some time with the kids! It was an experience today man. It seemed like the day took so long to go by. usually that’s not the case but i think it was a combination of me being a little stressed that i had a lot of reading to do when i got home as well as it being the last week of camp! The councilors are so antsy to get done with the camp it’s so obvious, me i can’t really stand the counselors anyway except for a few of them so that adds to how tedious the days can be for me haha.

I could feel the effects of not eating suhoor today though. Its rare that i feel that affected by whether or not i have suhoor but i believe it was partly b/c I was focusing on the kids too so that wares me down a lot emotionally as well as physically, believe me I felt it today.

I had to rush home today b/c i was feeling the pressure to get my readings done b/c i hadn't done any of it all day. It usually takes me about 2-2.5 hours to finish it all if i'm not doing well but on a good day about 2 hours. I got home today and i was so hungry and stressed out i just couldn't focus enough to read well and i was so slow. I just felt my body telling me to stop and sleep but i had to try to plug through so i could relax my mind a little if i tried to sleep. If its one thing we all know its very hard to rest, relax, or sleep when the mind is going mile a minute! I pushed through and managed to finish one of my 2 readings and started the second one before i decided to relax and clear my head.

I took about an half hour power nap and that worked wonders for me. I woke up and surprisingly K.O.ed the rest of my reading flipping pages with alacrity (or so it felt by my standards) and right as i finished it was time for iftar (breaking fast time)!

Though a little tight with the timing i managed to get it all done and I was happy about today. Tomorrow i will make the proper adjustments.

1. Set alarm clock
2. Start reading a little bit in the morning
3. Use any extra time i get to get ahead not talk and socialize!

People thanks for taking the time to read this. I hope it was helpful and worth your time. I'll try and keep them shorter and sweeter though.

Ma'as-salama (goodbye in arabic),
Mustafa

Ramadan (hijrah date 1431) Day 1-6

So my computer situation is a bit inconsistent so forgive me for missing the first five days. In a nut shell though the first day was a day of pure questions and a bit of doubt for me. I didn't wake up for suhoor and I wasn't sure if i was supposed to start on that Wednesday b/c there is always some discrepancy with the sighting of the moon. International sightings take place and are often done according to the calendar but the local sightings are more reliable. I prefer to go off of the local sightings of the moon more than the calendar anyway b/c for one the Prophet Muhammad did it that way and didn't have technology as an aid. Two, it leaves no doubt or questions floating around about when to start or finish fasting for the month but lastly (this one is kinda funny) its usually always later than the calendar!!! That said I am glad I've gotten things rolling for the month and i'm looking forward to what it has in store for me.

Ramadan is a month of not only food deprivation but also a lot of other excesses like music, girls, tv, all of the things in this world that take time away from your time with your building a better relationship with your creator. So during this month you not only rearrange all of your eating habits but you also try to abstain from other things which are not totally beneficial to you strengthening your spiritual connection with Allah. The mandate of abstinence from food and women during fasting hours of the day i find really forces you to be more reflective of your actions and things that you don’t need during your day and helps you realign things so that you can focus and restructure yourself during the month and even after Ramadan is over.

I've decided this month to really raise my level of prayers and make extra prayers that I have not been doing well at for the past year. I've also decided to cut out music entirely which i have control of manipulating. I've decided to watch less TV although that is a pretty blurry line i've drawn. I've made it my goal to ready the Holy Quran in Arabic from cover to cover and then some if possible before the end of Ramadan and also read some more supplemental Arabic readings and prayers. If it sounds like a lot its probably a fair amount. But I know I can do it, it’s all just a matter of getting things around me organized and making a decision to cut out the stuff i don’t need no matter what. We are creatures of habit, but habits usually start with the decision to do it or acceptance of the act/habit.

So those are my goals but i have to admit the first few days I have not done a great job executing. I've done well cutting out the music and reading, praying most of my extra (sunnah) prayers but I have been cutting it kinda close on my readings. It is said that there are 3 phases of Ramadan and they are broken into 10 day periods: I believe the first 10 days are for Allah’s grace, the second 10 are for his mercy and the last ten are for his bounty. I am banking that Allah is graceful and keeps accepting my efforts and making them easier for me as this first 3rd of Ramadan goes along.

I have to define another word for you guys quickly:

Sunnah: This is an act or practice that the Prophet Muhammad himself performed under no obligation or order from Allah.

as Muslims these acts are not only strongly encouraged but frowned upon if not followed for good reason. Basically you want to try your hardest to do not only the obligatory acts but also the sunnah acts too.

Ramadan Mubarak!!!

In an attempt to give this month its due I will be blogging everyday for the rest of the month of Ramadan. Ramadan is a 29-30 day month dictated by the cycle of the moon. sometimes the new moon is seen after 29 days, sometimes after 30, but never more than 30 days. This is the reason the islamic calendar is shorter than the gregorian calendar. Hence Ramadan is never always on the same day of the same month and is always changing, but the duration is always 29 or 30 days. So that said Ramadan is also a month of increased spiritual practice. It is said that when the physical is weak the spiritual is strong.

Here are some words I'd like you to know:
Suhoor: This is the meal taken in the early morning before sunrise (dawn). Fasting starts after Suhoor is taken, unless you wake too late to eat Suhoor. Fajr prayer is made after Suhoor.

Iftar: This is the meal immidiately after sunset. It breaks the fast and is done before the prayer (magrib).

Dont forget those two words, I use them a lot.

What can I say?

Well I have been up down and around this week. I was up at the big green this week just reconnecting with some of the folks as well as checking out my old campus. Although there is nothing "old" about Dartmouth these days I still felt right at home when I went back. I got to see Carl, Professor Gocsik, my boy Wayne B, accosted the one and only Andrew Wheating for running on my track without permission (he humbly apologized), and I almost pinned down a visit with ours truly "The Elusive" Amory Rowe haha!

I am stoked to get back to camp though and catch up with the kids, I hope they feel the same way. This week will be interesting given that I will be doing a lot of driving; probably about 2 days worth. But dont cry for me, I've done it before! Yes wish me luck though!

Mustafa